When I found out I was pregnant with my
first child at the age of 20 I was very excited. It was a planned pregnancy I was over the moon.
I started reading articles about breast
feeding verses bottle feeding and the majority of them leaned towards breast
feeding being the better option for my baby and bottle feeding only being used
if there was a medical reason. I decided that
breast feeding was the way forward and I couldn’t see any reason to spend money
on formula when I could get milk for free.
I went shopping for breast pads and nipple
creams and I also bought a breast pump and bottles for when my baby was a
little older.
I was quite excited about the prospect of
bonding with my baby through breast feeding and having one to one time.
When I was on labour ward my (not so
friendly) midwife asked me if I would be bottle or breast feeding. When I said
breast she seemed quite shocked and told me not many mums opt for breast
feeding anymore. I found that quite surprising. I had just assumed that most mums
breast fed unless there was a medical reason not to.
As soon as my son was born the midwife
helped me to get in the right position for him to latch on. He did immediately
and I was delighted. He did it again for the next two feeds but after the third
I could feel my nipples becoming sore. He was waking for a feed every two hours
and it was getting more painful each time.
I told one of the midwives how painful it
was and she told me that it could be because he wasn’t latching on properly and
she helped me try a new position and advised applying nipple cream.
When I looked around at the other mums on
the ward I couldn’t see anyone else breast feeding and I felt quite isolated.
I was discharged from the hospital the next
day and tried to persevere with the breast feeding and talked to my health
visitor. Nothing I tried seemed to work and I began to get really upset and
irritable. Obviously lack of sleep wasn’t helping. All the excitement of one to
one bonding had gone out of the window and I just wanted someone to
help me. I tried expressing milk
but it was taking too long and I had a screaming baby waiting to be fed. I gave
in and went to buy formula.
When I found out I was pregnant with my
daughter I wanted to give breast feeding another go. I came up against the same
situation again and ended up bottle feeding her too. It didn’t help that in the
first week she was born I developed and infection which meant I was throwing up
a lot and my son got chickenpox.
Despite all the problems I faced, if I ever
had more children I think I would still try breastfeeding again. I do believe
it is the healthiest option, however making myself ill with worry isn’t good for
anyone so I would make sure I had formula at home just in case.
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